FREINSHEIM – Germany (Sat 5 Sept)

Today is Daniela’s wedding day, it is still grey and overcast, but no rain. But we started the day with breakfast which was a royal feast. We are staying at a Bed and Breakfast in a winery, which seems to be the occupation of the majority of the population in this region. As you drive through small village to small village, the only reason for pause between them is the acre upon acre of vineyards. This is serious wine growing country, and their product displays their experience in the craft.

But more important than the wine, or perhaps in partnership with it, we had a wedding to go to in a small village just a few kms from Freinsheim called Forst. As luck would have it, the grey clouds cleared the way for blue sky and sunshine as the appointed hour drew near. As we drove up to the church, which was an old, small, sturdy looking building with a high steeple, we were greeted by the church bells ringing out their welcome. Inside the church it was very light and airy, with pipe organ and choir behind, bride and groom at the front, and friends and family gathered in support. We didn’t understand much of the service but we had the impression that the priest was a bit of a ‘character’ and injected a lot of his personality into the service. Being a Catholic service the priest did a bit of singing through the service, which raised the question with us whether a priest ever gets kicked out of ‘Priest School’ because his singing is crap.

Daniela looked absolutely stunning and Armin looked pretty fine as well. Daniela and Armin spent a year in New Zealand recently (I worked with Daniela, which is how we knew them), and the order of service was illustrated with photos from their travels there, which gave us an instant contact point. This was a theme that was touched on throughout the day and it became obvious (also by talking to their friends) that the time that they spent in NZ was very special to them.

It’s been a long time since either of us have been to a Catholic wedding and we have certainly never been to a German one, so we did notice a few differences in the way things were done. When the service was complete everyone exited the church before the bridal couple, and there was no rice or rose petals to greet them, but rather a table laden with food and wine for everyone to stand around and enjoy. We were then all given balloons with postcards attached, for us to write well wishes on, and then release into the air. Hopefully, at least some of them will find their way through the postal service and back to them.

From here it was back to Freinsheim for the reception, well to start with it was sitting around for coffee and cakes, before the bridal couple disappeared for photos. The reception wasn’t the formal affair of speeches that we are accustomed to, and it wasn’t the boozy type with people leaning on bars and quaffing as much food and drink as they can possibly hold because it is free. But rather it was a very fine meal of several courses interspersed with games and poems that involved all of the guests. It was a very relaxing and enjoyable afternoon/evening spent with fine people and fine local wine.

We aren’t sure who did the seating plan but we are very thankful to them for placing us at a table of people who spoke very good English and (a) didn’t mind using it and (b) didn’t mind translating things for us throughout the evening. One of the most amusing things was when the first course was delivered and the literal translation for the food was ‘Pigs Stomach’. The look on Justine’s face dropped like a stone and turned into one of disgust. Then it was explained to us that it was called that because like a pig’s stomach it contained everything, vegetables, meat, etc. It wasn’t literally a pig’s stomach, and by the way, it was very nice.

One of the presents that Daniela and Armin were given that night was a social calendar. One of their friends had organized a calendar for the next twelve months where every one of the guests does something or goes somewhere with or that involves Daniela and Armin. This might be going to the movies, helping in the rose gardens, or going to Finland and driving a dog sled for five days. We thought this was a very cool idea, a present that keeps on giving.

We got into some very interesting conversations with some of the guests. It was great to have the opportunity to ask the questions that we have been wondering about, and through the course of the evening we learnt quite a lot. In Fawlty Towers they say “Don’t mention the war.” What we found is that you don’t need to because it comes up anyway. These people have not forgotten, will never forget, don’t want to forget (to ensure that it doesn’t happen again), and don’t need people like you or I to remind them. I think that they have healthy attitude towards it. However we did ask if they ever had any sense of being proud to be German, and we got a resounding “No!” We found that to be rather sad. The only time that they had felt that pride was at the football world cup which they won.

We also talked about the compulsory military service/civil service that they do/have done here, which brought us back to the Swiss. One of the guests has lived in Zurich for a number of years and was telling us about the ‘siege mentality’ of the Swiss and how it goes far beyond what we had realized. The Swiss have a whole underground army, I mean, it is literally underground, in the mountains. Driving down here from Zurich, you drive through a tunnel, if you look for them you will see that the tunnel has huge gates which can close. Inside that mountain is an underground military hospital that has the capacity for 40,000 patients. This is just one example of the installations all around Switzerland that include airfields and army bases, that can be activated at a moments notice. This just shows the paranoia of this ‘Neutral’ country. Especially since this is a country that has nothing that anyone wants, which is why it was able to remain neutral during WWII and why Napoleon marched straight through it without stopping. We were also told that no matter how long you live there you will never be accepted, and if you lose your job you will immediately be told to go back to where you come from. To be accepted for citizenship, it has to go before the local community and they gather together to vote on whether they want you or not. Which is a little tough if you are a third generation Swiss who’s country of origin doesn’t exist anymore. If the vote comes back with a ‘No’, you effectively don’t have a home. Don’t you love the Swiss?